(Seppi the Cockatoo has his own column in Best Friends magazine, where he gets to critique the various articles. Today, however, he gets to squawk about an e-mail from PETA about the Vicktory dogs.)
A remarkable document crossed my perch today – a response from PETA to someone who had apparently written to them asking if their position was that the dogs rescued from Michael Vick should be killed.
You may remember their involvement in the case – they quickly took the media podium to tout their wonderful investigative work and how integral they were to the case. (Two cookies for you kids!) And they garnered more publicity off the backs of these poor scarred dogs than Britney Spears does on a Slurpee Bender!
Here's some of PETA's infinite wisdom from their Standard Response on what should happen to these dogs who have been rescued:
"Thank you for contacting PETA about the fate of the pit bulls who were rescued from Michael Vick's dog fighting operation. ...
"Given that these dogs had been chained, trained to fight, and denied everything that dogs need to be happy and well-adjusted, it was inevitable that some of them would have to be euthanized. Hard as it may be for us to accept, a painless release from the world that treated these dogs like fighting machines from the moment they were born was the most humane option.
"We are concerned that the remaining dogs, who have already suffered so much, have been shuffled off to Best Friends ..."
"Shuffled off?" Like old folks in slippers and a bath robe at a nursing home?
In fact, like New Yawkers to Boca come December, these dogs were loaded onto a private flight, courtesy of the U.S. government – destination sunny southern Utah. A miserable fate, indeed! Boatloads of treats, toys and people talking baby talk to the inmates. It's just like a scene from Les Miz!
"... shuffled off to Best Friends, a so-called "sanctuary" where they are unlikely to have steady, healthy contact with people."
Ah yes, I can see the bleakness on their faces every miserable day (and night) at Best Friends:
"In addition, these dogs will forever be at great risk of being stolen and ending up back in the fighting ring. Animal shelters are routinely burglarized by dogfighters who want to get their hands on valuable fighting dogs, as happened with pit bulls who were rescued during Hurricane Katrina – some of them disappeared from the shelter compound in the middle of the night. These dogs are high-dollar commodities to those looking to profit from fighting them."
Oh, I get it, now boredom and bleak loneliness are nothing compared to the risk of being stolen? And their example of this is Hurricane Katrina – an environment of total chaos in the middle of a national disaster. A little different from life in this part of the world. (Or does PETA imagine gangs of roaming undesirables lurking behind every juniper bush in canyon country?)
More important, the value of an ex-fighting dog as a "high-dollar" commodity for breeding drops faster than a diving falcon once they're spayed or neutered.
Oh, there was more. It was a long letter. I guess if you write to PETA asking what they think should happen to the Vicktory dogs, they'll send you the whole thing. Personally, I found it most useful – it makes a wonderful birdcage liner.
But if you're staying up late at night worrying about the safety of these dogs, you're right, you may agree with PETA that we should just kill them.
P.S. Should we dump them illegally too?